Sunday, December 11, 2011

The Talk

It was bound to happen sooner or later, but I was definitely hoping for later.

Saturday morning I had to have 'the talk' with Mini-Me.

Five just seems too young, but he said some things that told me it was time.

I was in the kitchen baking my umpteenth sheet of Christmas cookies while the kids and Rach were playing in the living room. In the background, I had the newly released McDonald's Cardinals World Series Championship DVD playing. It was a perfect morning full of the smell of cookies baking, the memories of championship baseball, and the sounds of children playing together without whining.

That's when it happened...a highlight of Albert Pujols hitting a home run caught Mini-Me's attention.

Yes, that Albert Pujols. The Albert Pujols Mini-Me calls Uncle Albert thanks to the fantasies of his aunt. The Albert Pujols whose first pitch, first at-bat home run during Mini-Me's first baseball game at Busch Stadium ignited fireworks above the stadium AND in Mini-Me's heart. The Albert Pujols whose first eleven seasons were beyond amazing. The Albert Pujols who is now a Los Angeles Angel of Anaheim.

"Wubster! Get up! Clap! Albert just hit a home run! Albert Pujols just hit a home run, Wubster! C'mon! We have to go cheer!"

The boys jumped up and scampered in front of the television, clapping and smiling. Tears welled up in my eyes.

"Wubster, Albert hit a home run! We have to cheer for him. Look at the fireworks, Wubster! Albert hit a home run and we cheer for him, but he's not our team anymore. He's on another team now, but we can still cheer for him. Right, daddy? Wubster, we can still cheer, but the Cardinals won't have as many home runs and fireworks anymore."

My tongue stumbled over the words my brain had not yet formed. I didn't think I'd have to talk to Mini-Me about this so soon. He must have heard kids talking at school!

"Daddy, why did Albert leave?"
Oh, uh, well...maybe you should ask your mother that question.
Oh, no you don't. This is a father-son talk. This isn't my job. Mini-Me, your dad will tell you.
Well, you see, Mini-Me, when a man and a woman really, really love each other...
Doug!
Er, well then, you know how you like playing with your Lego blocks?
"Yeah..."
You like your Legos, but if someone else had a lot more Legos, including some you didn't have...
"Like the AT-AT and the Turbo Tank and the Attack Shuttle and the..."
Yeah, yeah...like those...and they wanted to give them to you, would you keep your Legos or play with theirs?
"I'd play with the AT-AT!"
Well that's what happened...Albert's going to play with their AT-AT for the next 10 years.
"Why does the man and woman really, really love each other?"
Um...want a cookie?

Okay, so it wasn't my best explanation, but the cookie worked. Hopefully it'll work just as well in a few years.

P.S. Dear NaBloPoMo...sorry I failed you.