Athletic Support

Since he turned four, Mini-Me's tried T-ball, basketball, and soccer. In signing him up for these introductory sessions all we wanted was for him to see if he liked one better than another.

Some sample Noisy Little Sports Talks:

Hey, buddy...you wanna play T-Ball?
Yeah! I wanna hit home runs. Will there be fireworks?
Ummm...no...I don't think so.
Oh...
But you can still try to hit home runs!
Well...I don't know.

[Day two of T-ball]
I don't like T-ball!!! I don't wanna go!!! I wanna play superheroes!!!

[Several weeks pass]
Hey, buddy...you wanna play basketball or soccer?
Yeah! I wanna play basketball AND soccer!
Do you want to play indoor soccer or outdoor soccer?
I wanna play indoor soccer...and indoor basketball, too!

[Day two of basketball]
I don't like basketball!!! I don't wanna go!!! I wanna play Batman!!!

[Day six of basketball]
What was that girl's name again?
Amelia
Oh...Ameeelia...when can I play basketball again? What was her name again?
Amelia
Oh, yeah...Ammmeeeeliaaa. I like basketball, daddy.

The only sport he hasn't yet told us he doesn't like is soccer. We were impressed. We thought he'd found his athletic niche. We were wrong.

Turns out, Mini-Me's true measure of joy in a sport isn't the homeruns.
It isn't the fireworks.
It isn't the slam dunks.
It isn't the female teammates.

It's the uniform.

Soccer has shin guards and tall socks, but in Mini-Me's world, soccer has Batman armor and...thigh highs?

Yeah...thigh highs. The kid spent 90% of tonight's practice pulling his soccer socks up past his knees.

If dribbling the ball caused his socks to creep below his knees, he stopped to adjust.

If passing the ball to his teammate resulted in socks below knee level, he stopped to adjust.

If standing still, waiting for further instructions didn't impact sock levels, he stopped to adjust.

Does Victoria's Secret sponsor little league teams?